I’m being completely real right now. I thought the “old me” was gone, but this morning she reared her ugly head.
And I am not happy.
You see, my husband and I were supposed to run the biggest 10k of the year in our area this morning, The Cooper River Bridge Run. 6.2 miles from Mount Pleasant, S.C. to Charleston over the huge Ravenel Bridge. It was more important for me to run this race for a few reasons. One, I wanted to better my time over last year. Two, I am competing in my first half marathon in Disney World in less than two weeks and this was going to be my practice test run. Note the words “supposed to” .
Well, we had heard there was some nasty weather coming in and it was nasty…last night. We had the kids sleep over at my sister’s house and we woke up at 4am. We checked the radar like we always do. It did not look good. It showed red and yellow all over the race area. It looked like we were going to either be standing in pouring rain for an hour or two prior to the start, or we would be running the race in the rain. Neither was a great option. I know my body and I knew that if I was drenched, I would more than likely end up sick and thus, sick for my race, or at least fighting something off.
While that may be true, it was an excuse. And my former, not as “enlightened self”, was the queen of the excuses. I could make an excuse for an excuse.
But I thought my days of excuses were behind me.
Obviously I was wrong.
And, not only was I wrong about not making excuses, I was wrong about the weather and believing what my eyes were telling me. Of course, the weather cleared and the morning is now perfect for a run. Cool enough to run in, but not so cold that you would freeze.
I am choosing to take this as a major lesson learned.
The new “me” will no longer accept excuses. Not because I am worried about how others might feel about my decisions, but because I m not willing to accept excuses for myself. I am better than that. Excuses are a way of backing out, rationalizing, and giving myself enough reasons why I shouldn’t do something. I realize where I went wrong, and I have to thank Tony Robbins for teaching me all about this.
The race was obviously a “should” for me and not a “must’.
Had I made this race a “must”, I would not have made excuses to get out of it. I wanted to run. I really did. But I believe I wanted to run it on MY terms. Unfortunately, the terms I had set up for this race in particular, did not serve me and allowed me to have an out.
And I am so incredibly aggravated.
But instead of beating myself up for my excuses and staying in a state of feeling like I failed myself (which I did, willingly), I am going to leverage those feelings so that this never happens again. I need to make sure that the things that are important to me are a MUST.
Now, onward to my big race. Lesson learned.
And of course, the sun is shining again.